thru my eyes, ♥

i know i haven't been blogging in awhile, or if i do, its mostly pictures. in snapshot, mid-year's sucha bitchh. but of course, there's the OLD saying, its for your own good. yea right. apart from that, things haven't been smooth-sailing lately. in a twisted chain of events, summer's love(!) ending with summer. and fall doesnt look good either. and im still trying to find myself.

i dont understand why im feeling this way, and i dont feel like trying to understand. its like fixing a jigsaw, only to find a piece missing.i wish i could let it out. make someone understand me, then tell me why im feeling this rottten. i want to cry; alone. this this emotion is weighing me down, and i cant comprehend why. im still feeling the heart-burn thing at the mere thought of whatever it should be called. and i shouldnt be.

the whole encounter got me hanging from a thread. i don't know what's next. am i going to be delirious, or will i just spent the entire day second-guessing, and getting all wound up. i wish i could say it was stupid. and i wish i didnt fit the description. i wish i was tan. i wish i didnt look like a chinese. the whole affair, it was a mistake. and im all messed up.

back to basics. the people who really matter.

first, we'll compare mar's and my sastera text.SPOT THE DIFFERENCE.


plus, she got me laughing during sastera paper. with her ASO ALI ANA EPI & HI PER whatever. if i do badly for that question, its because i spent my energy trying to supress my laughter.

dina's rudolph now. and her wedding is tomorrow. and she invited me to the hotel reception. not the bawah block one. AWW.ohh, and she's marrying jackie. i don't know with chan or no chan.

and i miss the time when my feelings were hardened that it was difficult for me to feel anything. the time when emotions dont exist. because i felt it was easier to hate the people i love most. then, i wont feel this way. maybe im just selfish.